We’re All in This Together: Fear

Does fear sometimes get the best of you in your writing life? If so, how do you overcome fear? Fear of failure? Fear of judgment by others? Fear of not knowing whether you can make the writing do what you want it to do? 

These were questions I posed to WAITT writers on fear. I hope by reading them, you’ll encouraged to overcome fear and just write!

Alayne Kay Christian

Author of “Butterfly Kisses for Grandma and Grandpa”

http://alaynekaychristian.wordpress.com/

I handle fear by remaining aware of my feelings. For me, fear is a sneaky little devil. It shows up disguised as another feeling. For example, I might feel frustrated, overwhelmed, or sad. With awareness, I can connect the dots that usually lead from the secondary feeling to an irrational fear.

I haven’t experienced the fear of not knowing whether I can make the writing do what I want it to do. However, I have experienced the fear of not knowing whether I can make my writing do what “they” want it to do. I suppose what I really fear is “my” writing, which I refuse to give up on, will never meet “their” requirements. In other words, will my determination to be true to my own voice prevent me from moving forward in the publishing world? I guess there’s a fine line between fear and self-doubt. By the way, the word never is good kindle for feeding the fear fire.

Okay, this is turning into a true confessions post : Time to move on.

I believe fear is about our belief system, our attitude, our past experiences, and our imagined future. Therefore, I strive to be clear regarding what my true beliefs are. I work to stay out of an imagined future that might never happen and be present in the moment with the joy of being with loved ones and my writing.

Some quotes I like:

“Let go of insecurity – find confidence. Face fears – find courage. Step away from loneliness -find fulfillment.”  – Alayne Kay Christian

“If you fail at something you love, you don’t mind trying again and again.” – Alayne Kay Christian

“Rejections are proof that you are doing what you love. You are always a success if you are doing what you love.”  – Alayne Kay Christian

“Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It’s because we’re different that each of us is special.” – Brian Dyson

“The game is supposed to be fun. If you have a bad day, don’t worry about it. You can’t expect a hit every game.” – Yogi Berra

“I’d rather be a failure at something I enjoy than a success at something I hate.” – George Burns

“Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.” – Babe Ruth

“Worry is like a rocking chair. It will give you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.” – The United Church Observer

“By perseverance, the snail reached the ark.” – Charles Haddon Spurgeon

Robyn Campbell

Author of tickle your belly picture books and adventurous middle grade stories.

Robyn Campbell

Fear does grab hold of me often. I fear that people will discover I’m a fraud. I really do write picture books and I even have MG novels and a YA idea inside my head. But if writing stuff doesn’t move forward. If my stories do not get read, then I fear I’ll be labeled a phony baloney. I know writers who have left me behind. They have agents. And they’re published too. Yet here I sit. Still plugging along. I keep saying, “I’m getting close!”, when family asks. But am I? I hope so. I don’t fear making the writing do what I want it too. My characters let me mold them and shape them into who I want them to be. But no one wants to be dubbed the phoniest baloney in baloney land. Hmm. That’s a picture book. I gotta write that down. 🙂 I hope someday soon I’ll be able to announce my agent’s name. Until then I’ll plug along. But hey. “I’m getting close!”

Donna L. Sadd

Author of LUCCI–The No Poochie Smoochie

http://www.donnalsadd.wordpress.com/blog

Fear of failing and success held me back in the past, and that’s why I arrived at the party in my fifties. If I feel it, I just push myself to write…anything, a relaxing haiku, a rhyming ditty, a grocery list. If that doesn’t pick me up, I read and then become motivated again.

Immersing myself in the midst of like-minded folks has done a lot to keep fear at bay because I’ve realized that indeed, we’re all in this together, and feeling that I’m not alone gives me courage to keep plugging away. The encouragement of my critique group reinforces that feeling.

When fear does wheedle its way in, I simply remind myself of dozens of writers’ comments left in Facebook groups who have been at this a lot longer than me, and I’m reminded of the learning curve I’ve got to ride before I ‘get there.’

 

Marcie Flinchum Atkins

Children’s and YA Writer

https://www.marcieatkins.com

I don’t usually think about myself as being a fearful person. The only thing I have a phobia about is chickens. Yes, chickens.

But fear in my writing life is usually disguised as the “WHAT IFS.”

What if I never get my books published? What if I am sending out the wrong things? What if my query letter is not good enough to snag an agent’s attention? What if no one likes this story but me?

So what?

So what if  IF my work is never seen by anyone else?

Well, too bad. I can’t quit writing. When I go a day or two without writing something, I get cranky. I need to write for me. Even if no one ever reads it.

I had to realize that I loved writing. That’s why I write. I write for the process. Most of what I write will never see the light of day. I wouldn’t want it to. My writing isn’t wasted though.

I can’t NOT write.

If anyone else decides they like it, it’s a bonus. The only thing I should fear is this:

What if I never write anything at all?

That’s something that I fear–that I will get to the end of my life and never have written the stories that I really wanted to write. I don’t want that to happen. So I will get over the WHAT IFs and I’ll keep on writing.

Then I’ve not lived the life I wanted to live. And that’s something to be feared.

 “In the end it all comes down to this: you have a choice (or more accurately a rolling tangle of choices) between giving your work your best shot and risking that it will not make you happy, or not giving it your best shot–and thereby guaranteeing that it will not make you happy. It becomes a choice between certainty and uncertainty. And curiously, uncertainty is the comforting choice.” 

–David Bayles & Ted Orland ART & FEAR: OBSERVATIONS (AND REWARDS) OF ARTMAKING